You Are My Paramour

Its so weird knowing that you could leave and I could feel like im happy and moved on until I start to think about my happiest moments and every one of them involved you and im not the one to complain, I just missed you. I had too many people on my plate and it got me thinking... I cant walk this walk without you. You are my best friend you have been with me when everyone left and yea you might say your leaving but you always find your way back home to me shortly after. I told you the truth and told you all the things I have been going through. You were shocked. you said I didn't show it at all. My reply was that I know how to put a smile on my face and pretend to be happy and lie to myself so I wouldn't cry myself to sleep every night because I could only think negative about myself. You know my demons you know what I am capable of. So you weren't shocked when I told you this. It felt so amazing just telling you all of this because I was holding it in for so long. and after I told you all of this the unnecessary people in my life started to fade away. I told all my friends that I am done with all the going back and forth and I am focusing on you.